how trauma shows up in the body, again & again
sam- i feel as though i can chew the words you’ve written. the stories you write are so visceral, i can picture and feel what you write. i’m in the car with you and my throat is tight as we pass the places of our past lives. everything you write here always gets me feeling. thank you for sharing your words.
i’ve always thought that healing was radical, especially in the way that angela davis uses the word radical: “grasping at the root.” but goddamn, i’m so tired of grasping. it’s exhausting to feel so dysregulated all the time. it always makes me feel a little less alone to read words by other folks who cannot regulate at all, though i hate it for you (and me, and us)
Oof, yes. Yes yes yes. Thank you for the reminder that the NS transcends space and time in a way that is sometimes infuriating. (Also, chronology of water is SO GOOD.)
"It has deep roots; these days, they live in my pelvic floor and throat. " Woof.