To Being 30

30 things I've learned in 30 years

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I turn 30 today. Here are 30 things I have learned in my 30 years of life.

1. Your body often knows before your mind does.

2. The things I loved most as a kid, like journaling, scrapbooking, photography, and collaging, are the things that are the most self-connecting and healing as an adult.

3. Keep the keepsakes, even the printed receipts and photos of people you don’t talk to anymore.

4. You don’t have to do it all as an activist/advocate, but you must try because there is always at least one way each of us can participate.

5. Wrinkles are the most beautiful proof of life.

6. Do not put eggshells in your garbage disposal.

7. If it says it needs a screwdriver, a drill will probably make it go together faster, so buy a drill.

8. No matter what I write, other people’s experiences, biases, contexts, culture, etc., will be layered over it. I can do my best to consider the impact of how my words land across those layers, but I will never get it perfect. I will write anyway.

9. I like cappuccinos better than lattes.

10. So much of life is fake it ‘till you make it. No one has it figured out.

11. Trauma isn’t an excuse, but it is sometimes a reason, and it’s important to explore the why behind those reasons.

12. Binaries don’t exist and it is a skill to unlearn either/or thinking.

13. Sharing online isn’t always connecting, sometimes it ends up being really isolating.

14. I don’t like reading fiction as much because I have aphantasia, which means I can’t create mental imagery easily (but I will try to start reading fiction anyway).

15. Something that was once true can change to no longer be true.

16. Couscous is pasta, not a grain.

17. Gender is deeply personal and no one’s gender experience is the same.

18. The relationships we are in can impact our understanding of our identity.

19. You can never fully know/understand a person strictly through social media, no matter how much our culture believes it to be so.

20. Anthocyanin is the pigment that makes plants, vegetables, and fruits appear purple.

21. I may never find a label that perfectly matches my sexuality, and that’s okay.

22. It usually takes more energy to avoid something than actually to do that something.

23. If you are thinking about it, you should probably talk about it. Don’t keep it inside.

24. One of my favorite smells is that weird, colorful soap they spray your car with at car washes.

25. If you’re not connecting to your body, you’re not accessing healing at full capacity. 

26. Phone calls are better than Facetime most of the time.

27. Having a smaller, color-blocked capsule closet you actually wear in real life is more fulfilling than a closet full of stuff that looks cool in photos online.

28. I have grown into someone who prefers sunshine to rainy days (I blame disco balls for this shift).

29. You cannot shame yourself into being the person you want to be.

30. We need an immediate, unconditional, and permanent ceasefire now. End the occupation. End the genocide. Free Palestine.

    

Thanks to everyone who has checked in and been patient with me, as I have been practicing non-urgency during these last few months. I am happy to be back to writing and sharing.

Thanks for sticking around.

Love,